Mamarati

ok, I was trying to sleep, then decided I wanted something to drink, so got up out of bed to get it and didn’t even make it to my door before I jumped right back on the bed, petrified and didn’t move for like 10 minutes. I’m freaking out. I’m totally scared. I can barely move. My heart is pounding and I’m not breathing so well. OMG I want this to stop. I saw sixth sense today, and stuff like that always scares me. ghosts and such. I can’t deal with that information. Now it’s freaking me out, and it’s been a good long while since I’ve had this fear in me. Interesting bit of synchronicity… radiojerks diary earlier, someone left a note about the changling. that was the scariest movie for me. freaked me out so totally bad, I could not sleep with the lights out for a month. Had the most horrible nightmares. and made me feel just like I am feeling right now.

I opened my buddy list a second ago just to see if anyone I know in “real life” is on so I can have them call my house so that someone can come and retrieve my petrified ass from this bed. I don’t even want to go to the door.

This is bad. And I get the worst sleep when I sleep with the lights on. I want to go lay down with Kim, but I’d never make it there. And my closet door is open, and that’s not helping. and there’s all this wind and tree branch noise outside my window. not helping either. OMG I am so tired and all I want to do is get a good night’s sleep. This is so wrong. I will never fall asleep till the kids start getting ready for school and I can scream at one of them, but that’s 3 hours away. Ack. Why did I have to start thinking about this?

I think I’m going to start knocking on my wall and see if my brother will wake up. He sleeps so hard though. Oh I hate this feeling. Dammit. Not seeing any more movies like that. NO more. Not stir of echoes, dammit. Not now.

OH HELP ME